Leadership Decoded: What Actually Works in the Real World
- Tamuna Gabilaia
- Mar 18
- 9 min read
Updated: Mar 19
Working alongside some of the world's most successful entrepreneurs, CEOs, and visionaries for decades has revealed the core of what truly works in leadership—and it's far simpler than you might expect.
I've found that leadership isn't about complicated theories. It's about a few key principles that consistently deliver results. Not trendy ideas, but practical truths I've seen succeed repeatedly with real people.
These same principles show up across all contexts - whether in business, entrepreneurship, or personal life. Let me share what I've learned through years of experience, not just from management books or leadership theories.
You're Allowed to Say "I Have No Clue"
Let's be real - nobody has all the answers. Not me, not you, not even the most successful people in the world. Surprisingly powerful words in leadership aren't 'I have a vision' or 'Let me inspire you.' They're - I don't know - what do you think?
I've seen this simple question light up a room, sparking an outburst of ideas that were just waiting for a chance to shine. You could feel the energy shift. Pure magic.
The pressure to know everything is enormous for leaders. We've been conditioned to believe that leadership equals certainty. But here's what research has consistently shown: teams perform better when leaders are honest about what they don't know. It creates psychological safety – that feeling that it's okay to take risks, to speak up, to contribute without fear of embarrassment.
When a leader says "I don't know," they're not showing weakness. They're demonstrating strength and confidence. They're creating space for others to step up and shine. They're modeling the very behavior they want to see in their teams – intellectual honesty and curiosity.
Think about it: would you rather work with someone who pretends to know everything or someone who acknowledges when they're unsure and asks for your input? In our complex, fast-changing world, working together always beats going it alone.
Pay Attention and Listen (Really Listen)
Listening well is a skill that many struggle with. I've observed in countless meetings how easy it is to get distracted. We might nod while checking our phones, rehearse what we're going to say next, or interrupt because we feel our point is very important.
If you want to become a better leader, close your laptop. Put your phone away. Look at the person who's speaking. And truly listen to what they're saying. When you genuinely listen rather than just pretending, you unlock a wealth of insights and ideas.
What we often forget is that listening is where innovation begins. Research from Harvard Business Review shows that executives who score high on listening skills consistently outperform their peers in decision-making effectiveness. It's about creating that space where people feel truly heard - not just waiting for your turn to speak.
An essential question great leaders ask isn't 'what should we do?' but 'what am I missing?' This represents a fundamental shift from talking to listening, from assuming to understanding, and from directing others to collaborating with them.
I've seen some of the most successful individuals practice this diligently, and believe me—it's like watching them have a superpower. The leaders who master this skill don't just hear words, they discover gold.
Curiosity > Courage Every Single Time
Everyone talks about courage in leadership. "Feel the fear and do it anyway!" Well, that's nice. But here's the truth: curiosity beats courage every time.
I remember my first skydiving experience. Was I scared? Absolutely. But I had always wanted to do it, and my curiosity was so much stronger than my fear.
The surprising thing was that once I jumped, I wasn't scared at all. It was the most amazing experience, one that's hard to describe with words. And when I landed, something inside me changed. I had transcended something fundamental. Then I did it again and again. Once you overcome your fear, it no longer has power over you.
This is exactly how curiosity works in leadership. When you're truly curious, you're not thinking about how scared you are. You're thinking "I wonder what happens if..." or "What could we learn from." or "I've never tried that before."
The best leaders I know aren't fearless, they are just more curious than they are afraid. That's what moves the world forward.
If Everyone Thinks the Same, Someone's Not Thinking
My favorite meetings (and most fun and memorable) are the ones where people have different ideas. If your team agrees on everything, you don't have a dream team - you have a problem.
Different perspectives aren't just "nice to have" - they're how you avoid massive blind spots. They're how you find solutions no single brain could discover alone.
This reminds me of something funny that happened with my daughter. She would frequently walk in during brainstorming sessions with colleagues I deeply respect and consider good friends. To her, it sounded like we absolutely couldn't stand each other - the back-and-forth, the challenging of ideas, the animated disagreements. One day she asked me, "Mom, why do you keep working with them if you argue so much?"
I had to laugh and explain that what sounded like arguing was actually our most productive mode. That's just how we brainstormed together. We had common goals but different strengths, and those passionate exchanges were exactly how we found our best ideas. Sometimes we'd hit a roadblock and walk away, but we'd always come back the next day having thought things through, ready to find the best approach and move forward together.
Can you imagine if everyone saw things exactly the same way? We'd never make progress. The best people I've worked with agreed on the main goal but had different approaches to getting there. And during this brainstorming of different ideas from different perspectives, that's where the magic happens - where innovation is born.
Failing Doesn't Make You a Failure
Many successful people I work with have their share of failures. The difference is they don't hide them, they don't blame others, and they don't let failures define them.
Studies show that this openness to learning from mistakes leads to better problem-solving and innovation. They just say "Well, that didn't work!" and move on to the next thing - a little wiser, a little more experienced, and surprisingly, a much more confident.
As a former athlete who used to train at least four hours a day, I learned something important: when people call it "failure," it's not really failure at all. What is failure? You tried your best. I call it an attempt at your best. You didn't succeed at this particular time, but that tells you something valuable.
In sports, you have to train your mind to be tough - maybe even tougher than your body. Mental resilience is what separates those who bounce back from those who stay down.
Every athlete knows. that talent only gets you part of the way - It's your mindset that determines how far you can go. Dealing with setbacks, staying focused and keeping going is not something you are born with. It's a skill you build over time, just like anything else.
What we're often missing is how important it is to stop and rethink. Take that moment to pause, reflect on what happened, learn the lesson, and then continue forward with new understanding. The real growth happens in these moments of reflection, not in the endless pushing forward.
The Small Stuff IS the Big Stuff
Why do people stick with a job or decide to leave? It's rarely about grand mission statements or strategic company goals. It's about everyday moments. Does their boss remember their birthday? Do they ask how their weekend was? Do they admit when they're wrong?
These "little things" aren't so little. They're everything. As Maya Angelou beautifully put it, "People will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." When leaders focus on the little things, they create a culture of trust, respect and connection. And that is what keeps people engaged, motivated and committed for the long haul
Your Word Should Be Unbreakable
Working with people at the top of their game has only reinforced my conviction: integrity isn't just a nice value to talk about. It's fundamental.
When you say you'll do something, do it. When you make a promise, keep it. When you mess up, own it. Being a person of your word is like having a superpower. It's non-negotiable.
This one's personal for me. When I say I'll do something, I do it. Simple as that and everyone who knows me and works with me knows they can count on my word.
In a world where commitments are often treated casually, your reputation for reliability becomes your greatest asset. It builds trust faster than anything else and creates the foundation for every meaningful relationship - personal and professional. Trust is like fine Baccarat crystal - once broken, even if repaired, the cracks will always remain visible.
Make your word something people can build their plans around.
Humor: The Secret Weapon in Leadership
Research shows the best leaders have a good sense of humor. And it makes perfect sense when you think about it.
Humor is like leadership magic. It loosens tension, makes difficult conversations easier, and reminds everyone that we're all just humans trying our best. I've seen humor defuse conflicts that at first seem difficult to resolve. I've seen it build bridges between people. And I've seen it transform stressful situations into moments and memories that will be remembered forever.
The ability to laugh (especially at yourself) isn't unprofessional - it's essential. That well-timed joke or comment can instantly change the energy in the room, opening the door to solutions that weren't visible before.
Caring Isn't Weak, It's Your Secret Strength
Somewhere we got this bizarre idea that caring about people makes you soft. That's complete nonsense. Caring about your work and your people isn't a liability - it's your greatest asset. It's what makes people want to follow you even when things get tough.
The leaders who inspired the most loyalty weren't the toughest - they were the ones who genuinely gave a damn about their mission and their people. I've worked with some of the most caring, wonderful people over the years and I would do anything for them in a heartbeat.
When you truly care, people know it. They feel it. And they'll walk through fire for a leader who they know values them as humans, not just as resources. So stop holding back your empathy - it's not a weakness to overcome, it's a superpower waiting to be unleashed.
The Power of Staying Humble
There's this quote that's often attributed to Hemingway (though no one really knows if he actually said it): "There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man. True nobility is being superior to your former self."
It doesn't really matter who said it - it's so true either way. Leadership isn't about being better than everyone else—it's about becoming better than you were yesterday.
Throughout my career, I have the joy of working with some of the most accomplished entrepreneurs in the world. What's truly amazing about these people is their humility. Despite their remarkable success and far-reaching influence, they remain grounded and genuine in every conversation. They celebrate others' wins and ask questions instead of having all the answers. Many of these relationships have developed into genuine friendships that continue to this day.
Humility isn't weakness—it's strength that creates space for others to shine. It builds trust in ways that authority alone never could and keeps you open to perspectives you might otherwise miss.
Remember, your greatest competition isn't the person next to you—it's the person you were yesterday.
You Never Graduate from Leadership School
Here are my final thoughts: there's no finish line in leadership. No point where you've made it and can stop learning.
We still make mistakes daily. We still have moments where we think what am I doing? And I've watched numerous leaders do the exact same thing. The moment you think you've mastered leadership is the moment you stop being a good leader.
These leadership principles have guided me throughout my career and life - simple principles that create extraordinary results. Nothing complicated or fancy, just human wisdom that stands the test of time.
Leadership isn't about having all the answers. It's about listening deeply, embracing different perspectives, staying curious just like children do with their natural sense of wonder, learning from mistakes, keeping your word, using humor, genuinely caring, and remaining humble enough to keep growing.
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